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Archive for the ‘Odds and Ends’ Category

A Sure Way to an Oscar Nomination

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A while back, I saw the new Sarah Silverman movie, I Smile Back. You can find my terse review of it over at AndersonVision.com. Basically, the movie wastes a great performance by Sarah Silverman with a structureless script that has Silverman’s character make baffling choices for no apparent reason.

Anyway, perusing Google News, a review of I Smile Back came up and I took a gander to see what other people are saying about this foray into misery porn.  That’s when I found this:

 

The role has Oscar nomination written all over it: See the actress grind on a teddy bear, sleep with strangers, snort cocaine off a bathroom floor, lie to her saintly husband, and ache with excruciating, visceral love for her still-perfect children.

 

Listen up lady! Masturbating with teddy bears does not get you an Oscar nomination. It didn’t work for Liam Neeson, it aint going to work for Silverman!

"I only masturbated with a female teddy bear. I mean really -- what am I? A pervert?"

“I only masturbated with a female teddy bear. I mean really — what am I? A pervert?”

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Written by B. Michael Krol

November 16, 2015 at 3:44 pm

Odds and Ends pt 1

with 2 comments

1. I don’t want to turn this blog into a site for my rants and random hectoring (too late), but texting while driving is one of the worst ideas in the long sad history of bad ideas.  Seriously, who does this?  I don’t care if you put your phone on the wheel and text with your thumbs, you still have to pay attention to what you’re writing.  It still distracts you from the road. You’re driving, Sunshine; things happen suddenly that requires your attention.  More so than typing “LOL at ur joke.”  Lord, what will humanity do without that little interaction.  And yes, I have used my cell phone while driving.  But that was when I was young and full of beans.  I no longer do it.  I’ve learned my lesson about distracted driving, and I did it without splattering a family of four. And yes, I know it is possible to multitask, but if you think texting while driving is a good idea, I’m concerned about your ability to task, let alone multitasking.

And to paraphrase Kurt Cobain, sorry to sound so cravenly PC about this, it’s just the way I feel.

2. This week I hope to get my vampires post done and a post examining the early 90’s counterculture through a Sonic Youth video.  Along with other bits of random detritus.   The vampires thing is taking longer than I expected.  It went from being a humorous piece to a serious look at a cultural phenomenon. However, doing a serious piece would require me sitting through the Twilight “Saga” and baby, life is too damn short.  So I’m going

I had no funny ideas using pictures this morning, so here's a picture of Thurston Moore from Sonic Youth

back to being snarky.

3. Lebron James is a serious egotist.  And Cleveland should complain to the league about tampering.  Something nefarious went down, and if Stern wants to protect the integrity of the NBA (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!), he should do something about it.

4. New York will win five games next year.

5. I might — might! — elucidate some of my thoughts on last night’s Entourage episode.  My complaints last week must have been addressed. This week’s plot line featured Vince getting a haircut and *gasp* him not asking permission first! Too bad TNT trademarked the slogan “We Know Drama” cause HBO’s coming back hard on the drama baby!